How Can Two Kids From The Same Gene Pool Be So Different?

Chalk and Cheese

Black and White

Yin and Yang

Edie and Bridie

My kids have the same mother, the same father (hopefully), and, come from the same biological gene pool……

SO WHY ARE THEY SO DIFFERENT?

Over the last 4 weeks, our kids have changed…..I don’t know if it’s the heat…..but, something has ‘gone wrong‘ with them.

Our cute little 1 year old has turned into an angry, foot stamping, paddy throwing, whinging little shit……and…..the ‘happy go lucky’ 8 year old has transformed into a neurotic, anxiety riddled drama queen.

When, and how did this happen?

One minute, they’re the ‘apple of your eye‘, and the next minute, they’re giving you ‘a huge pain in the kidney‘.

My girls couldn’t be more different….

Our Edie is emotional, inquisitive, funny, kind and sensitive.
As a baby…..she fed well, she slept well, she was comfortable around other people, she didn’t cry much, and, she rarely gave us any real trouble.

On the other hand, our Bridie is clingy, cheeky, restless, noisy, and, a real oddball.
As a baby…..she feeds the dog more than she feeds herself, she sleeps for about 3 hours per day (but, never at night), she’s a proper show off, she moans and cries CONSTANTLY, and, she’s harder work than differential calculus.

Thankfully, they’re both super cute…..and, I love them more than kebab meat and chips.

However…..In my mind….I’d planned to be a supportive, super-cool, ultra-patient daddy, with an awesome haircut, and effortlessly raise two intelligent, well adjusted and emotionally stable children.

But, instead, I’m an overweight, impatient, totally un-cool dick….with shit hair and acne……because….they’ve broken me….the goddamn kids have broken me….and….i’ve morphed into a mere shadow of a man…..committed to shuffling through the rest of his shattered life…..in clothes from Tesco’s……and, painfully treading on discarded Peppa Pig characters…whilst being forced to read the book ‘My Dad’, over, and over, and over, and over….like some form of parent based torture.

……and, I wouldn’t have it any other way.